說不出的告別 - 林志炫

作詞：樓南蔚　作曲：黃峻

回程的飛機　　滑進了無邊的天際　一樣的天氣兩種心情
裝 滿回憶的行李　留在原地　是愛的紀念品

＃這一趟旅行　寫完了故事的結局　沒有驚嘆句　沒有疑問句
如果我不夠堅定　喊出了你的名字　 打破沉默的僵局
我該說對不起　還是稱心如意
我遠遠看著你　保持著安全的距離
卻有個聲音　在我心裡　掙扎著要出去
從你眼睛 　看不出你是否找到新戀情
那抹憂鬱　刺痛著我不可能忘記
 
＊我說服我自己　沒有我你會更順心
可能你已經　雲淡風輕　當我 是個曾經
是不甘心　還是依然愛著你
在告別之後讓它隨風去

It's been a night, a night of restlessness; a night full of bother.

You tell me it is not worth it, it is going to be a waste of time and life; You tell me you'd rather grant chances to random beings; You tell me that you'd rather pick up what you can get, rub it in my face and eventually lead to me giving up.

Well..... I'd rather be pushed to hell than to see that happen. You say you will feel guilt imposing that sort of action on me, but perhaps can you say guilt is any less when you decide to rub it in my face? I simply do not understand or simply am I just not up to your standards, am I really among the worst candidates. Shall you decide that I am not worth the try, perhaps, it means that I am destined to run my own path once again,

 Alone. 

I don't get it. Does it seem like there has to be a reason to treat someone well. Okay maybe most people do ask for a return, but I really don't. You can treat me like total shit and I will still be the one to give you all I've got. WHY? I don't know but if I think you are worth it then by all means take all you want. Or I can always be there when it's needed, I am just that simple, just be happy, really.

It's okay for one to be out of his/her mind once in a while. I really do think it is, but it is also important to realize, it will no longer be okay if he/she doesn't straighten it. Sometimes every guy would wonder: why can't people just be more straight forward and make their words clear? This hypothesis is totally feasible under the condition in which the world is made up of only males.

Okay okay, maybe not a totally perfect society but let's say when a guy doesn't like you, you get the immediate idea through a course of bloody actions. It's painful but it will heal, or at least you will get idea immediate instead of finding out later after you've pissed him off enough to make your life more miserable than it would've been.

Life would be totally better if people can just be a little more straight forward... Especially for one's closer / best buddies, if you feel that he/she is an idiot, say so because it's better you address it now than never. It is definitely easier to try to address one issue at a time than 10 or 20 or even 100. Don't pile up hard-feelings, they never go away, they will stay there gladly to haunt you for life. When you are unhappy, spit it out and surely your truest friends will be there to understand and tell you they care, even if it means that they will have to change for you. Afterall, friends are there for that sole purpose and why be going crazy in your own little world when you will get nothing out of it but another day of misery?

Dinner... 

After dinner...

Bullshit

It is simply too much bullshit to believe when someone says he/she will eventually become successful or hopefully will find his/her way. "Eventually" is not even the correct term to begin with, things will eventually happen but most likely not the way you want it. If you ever want something done, don't just keep talking, work at it and give it a try. There's never a definite win, but if you don't try at all you will for sure lose, knowing that losing is always that simple. 

Time/ timing

is always an important factor to everything. Have you once whined that about an imperfect timing? In my understanding, there is never imperfect timing, timing is something that you create for yourself. For instance, if you really want to meet this person, you will attempt to find opportunities to bump into them or at least create a flowing conversation. The question is, can you handle this situation or do you have the courage to create this instance. Whenever you are about to whine about life or whine about things that are not going your way, think again. Ultimately, you are the one with the most influence to create your own fairy tales and stories. Despite it being a successful story or not, your every fail step contributes to your next step, and lets be optimistic and say every fail step is a requirement towards your upcoming success. The ones who succeed are the ones who are consistent and continue to create their own perfect timing.

Sorry

It is very common for people to say sorry. How often do you say it? once a day, twice, or once a month? Personally, I hope I will never have to use this word again, like ever. When you say sorry it either means something unfortunate has happened to the other person or you have done something wrong. Yes, I do know that this is a little too naive, but use it wisely, don't use it too often because it will lose its meaning when you overuse it. 

Admire, Like, Love

How often do you admire someone? Is liking someone same as loving someone? Admire, is a form of action to show interestedness, good feelings and perhaps recognition for someone's charms, actions or character. Like, is a form of action to show this form of admiration in a more direct action, such as in words. When you like someone, you will want to show them your most attractive side; you will want to get them to like you back; you will want to spend time with them and do all sorts of romantic activities to make them feel that you are the one.

Essentially, I will outline the idea of liking as a series of filtered actions. You will never see the true side of someone that likes you, because they will always try to hide it to make themselves look greater than they are. People who like you will usually look for a series of sexual affiliations, as simple as they will want to see you in bed or they will want to at least taste your lips. 

Loving, is a form of dedication and perhaps ownership. You cannot simply love someone at first sight. If you feel the sudden excitement when you see someone, you are either admiring their looks or their body, at most their personality (but i mean if its first sight, how do you even know their true personality?) When you begin to date them and start to accept this person, you have your form of "like". Think again before you say you love someone. When you say you love someone, you will have to accept every aspect of the person. For instance, if a person has mood swings, you will have to understand them and continue to bear with it. I am not saying you have to bear with every thing, but you will have to learn to compromise. Now think again, what if the person you claim that you love suddenly becomes overly-obesed or perhaps became disabled because of an accident? Will you continue to love this person, now think again before you say yes. It is very easy to say yes, we are men indeed and it is very easy to say I LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT. However, if you stopped and actually thought about it, it means that perhaps you are once again bullshitting and you do not love the person at all. You may say you like the person because she is hot and gives great blow jobs, but you simply do not like the person.  Like said before, love is not simple, it requires time, dedication and endurance. Don't misunderstand this statement, loving does not mean 24/7 together. Simply give the appropriate attention, give the required care when needed, create some surprises once in a while, give each other room, learn to trust. 

Thing's changed, life's changed, an aspect of me has changed, but somethings never change.  My inability to stop it from changing frustrates me. 

It seemed like there's no turning back and if it were to ever end, it would be in a pile of mess. Why does it even have to be like that? I don't want to lose more...

It's not like I am asking to be a rich or asking to be famous. I've been looking for something so simple, yet it seems like reaching for a star. I can't grasp it... It's right in front of me literally, but I cant grasp it because it says "pick me up and I will immediately vaporize". 

I am so STUPID.

I haven't bothered to write on this blog for quite a long time now. I've abandoned this for such a long time I forget what it is like to be a casual writer. In the past year, I've written so many business letters and essay that I want to just drop it right now. I hate writing, I really do, but sadly I really want to write for some reason. Perhaps it is a little stupid to try to make sense right now after an all-nighter.

But I mean, since when have I not pulled all nighters? 10 years ago, sleeping at 1 seem really late. Nowadays, sleeping at 6am seem like a little too early. Sleeping is enjoyable to me, to an extent when I can actually sleep with full cycles, not when I have a cycle every hour. Can I not just sleep soundly for once?

Here's a song by Hacken Lee. Still, not many singers can match up to his singing. Notice the lyrics and composition, its quality composition.

An older song of sammi, although i dunt really think the mv really makes much sense with the mood of the song, definitely something to remember.

On a magazine a while ago, read about this new concept / prototype of an architectural design. It was designed by a chinese :]. This building has an estimate investment value of over 10billion dollars. It will be the tallest building on earth, being at least 10 times taller than our CN tower. (oh my god, I hate heights) The building's energy source will come from natural energies such as solar power, wind power, etc.

This building will be able to support a population of 10million, which is even more than the city of Hong Kong. Believe it or not, I actually had this concept when I was 9 and I did it for my elementary school science project, dreams are coming true .

Anyhow, got work everyday, monday to sunday... Still one more exam to go. time to sleep.

School courses, exam, assignments, everything is about to be over. It's a time of relieve, but it's also a time to say bye. Goodbye to my second year. As quick as it seems, the year has already passed. Congradulation to people who made graduate schools, best of luck. It's summer time, well not exactly yet. It's time to work, time to make money, time to get away from school for a little. I'd always believed that work is another experience from school. School is a place of comfort, support, friendliness. Work is a place of challenge, fraud, every-men for themselves. It's not a simple game, that's why to a lot of people it's another side of life.

NTSA soon.